out

super active and alert baby + sleepless long flights + jetlag + new tooth + grocery delivery at 7am (8 hours ahead of eta) = one conked out (sp?) maman

the little one got sick for the first time (a mere cold) two days before our flight to the US - while the pediatrician was on vacation... she got sick the second time while in the US (while I was working very long days)... and got sick for the third time the day before we had to leave the US. that's three times in 2 weeks. 0 times in the previous 7 months.

we've been back for ten rough days. her sleeping is erratic to err on the gentle side. brutal and hellish comes a bit closer to reality. I feel pulled back to 5 months ago. ouch.
i'd attribute it to jetlag if it weren't for the fact that she's like clockwork, waking up and going to bed at the same time every day. but she won't stay down.
so the doc thinks it's teeth. i was thinking "teeth, schmeeth", you know; she's got three already, what's another gonna do to her? well, apparently i should've been asking "what's four simultaneous ones gonna do to her". all top four teeth seem to be coming in at once. yikes.
right now, i wish she'd been born with a full set of teeth.

i'm having a blast though, mostly watching her.
for instance, she meticulously picks up every dry leaf she comes across, crumbles it between her fingers and looks on ecstatically, then spots another, squats down, picks it up, crumbles, ad vitam aeternam.
so instead of playing with her, i'm filling the role of bodyguard/bystander. i've stocked up on bump and bruise medication. we're set for a whole new set of adventures.

work was awesome. the conference was beyond inspiring. it was grounding, uplifting, heart-wrenching, eye-opening. wow. i am in awe of these women. and it's my job to work with them. wow.
but i'm tired of the manual. tired of working on it on my own. tired of too little sleep and too little feedback on it.

i need a vacation.

the little one's started daycare - sort of. she got kicked out of it - sort of: last week was 'adaptation' week. went in with her for a half hour the first day. then subsequently she spent 1/2 hour, 1 hour, 2 hours, 5 hours on her own there. did splendidly well (except for the eating). she's so social and excited to have new faces and new toys, i knew it wouldn't be a problem. so monday off we go for the first full day. she'd done one of her wake-up-every-2-hours the night before stint followed by a refuse-to-take-a-morning-nap routine. we were all a little pooped. i got a call from the daycare two hours after i dropped her off asking me to come pick her up. that she'd spent the time screaming (except for a brief nap). wouldn't even drink expressed milk. a disaster.

stay tuned as tomorrow's attempt #2 at a full day at daycare.

i already feel immensely guilty at leaving her there in great (2 adults + a supervisor for 5 babies) but not oustanding care. please let me have a few hours before she's sent home so i can make progress on the darn manual at times other than 11pm at night.

i must sound pretty down, which really i'm not. i've had a fabulous day - we went to the park to look at ducks and horses and dogs (love of her life), and dry leaves and wood sticks of course (love of life #2). the metamorphosis between the mostly-horizontal baby to the now mostly-vertical pre-toddler is absolutely fantastic and fun and cute and endearing.

and i wish you were all much closer so you could come see it.